


The Sweetness of Peas

by Anonymous



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: 2017 World Figure Skating Championships, Alternate Universe - Escorts, Alternate Universe - Robots & Androids, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, April Fools' Day, Crack, Dreams, First Time, M/M, Murder Mystery, Protests, Seriously this was an April Fool's Joke don't take it seriously lmao, Virgin Victor Nikiforov
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-01
Updated: 2017-04-01
Packaged: 2018-10-13 16:40:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10517703
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: The door swung open, and three-time consecutive World Champion and living legend in figure skating Viktor Nikiforov was on the other side.Yuuri couldn’t do this.But he smiled anyway, and asked, “Were you expecting me?”





	

Yuuri Katsuki stood in front of the hotel door, one hand apprehensively raised to knock. His stomach felt like it was twisting into knots. He only really did this escorting job on the side, since figure skating and attending college in Detroit were both extremely expensive things and his scholarship could only cover so much. And even though it’s not the first time he’s had to go to the client’s place, he could still feel the nerves wrack him.

After a long moment of pondering he realised it would look weird for him to spend any more time lingering in this hotel hallway in front of a door and knocked on the wood. He could hear the footsteps from inside the room, and he took a deep breath to steep himself for this mystery client who had requested him over the phone.

Usually, Yuuri wouldn’t accept mystery clients, but there had been a certain tone of mischief in the voice requesting him that he couldn’t quite ignore. And if something bad happened, he could always call his roommate Phichit; his best friend knew about this and was always willing to come to his rescue. He could do this. He could handle this mystery client.

The door swung open, and three-time consecutive World Champion and living legend in figure skating Viktor Nikiforov was on the other side.

Yuuri couldn’t do this.

But he smiled anyway, and asked, “Were you expecting me?”

Viktor looked at him with a small frown. “I’m… not sure, actually,” he said. “Are you the date my friend set me up with?”

“I think so?” wondered Yuuri. Viktor stood aside to let him enter the room, and Yuuri couldn’t help but notice that the man was dressed in nothing but a black dressing gown. His other clothes were hung up in the closet, including his costumes for the World Championships. Yuuri had seen those on the television, of course, but nothing could compare to seeing them in person.

He turned, to find that Viktor was now on the bed, lying down with the robe hanging open around him and exposing his toned chest. Swallowing thickly, Yuuri went to the bed and clambered on, straddling Viktor’s hips.

“I haven’t ever done this before,” said Viktor.

“I can help you out,” said Yuuri.

Viktor bit his lower lip. “I… I’m not sure how to do any of this,” he admitted. “Like I said, this is my first time, so if we do… you’ll be gentle, right?”

Yuuri couldn’t help but roll his hips a little, watching the flush spread from Viktor’s cheeks down, down, _down_ — “Leave it to me,” he said, and smirked at how wide Viktor’s eyes got in response.

He began to tug at Viktor’s robe, fingers deftly undoing the sash that was now barely holding it closed. Viktor’s expression went from nervous to aroused very quickly at that; especially as Yuuri rolled his hips again, eliciting a moan as his hands played across Viktor’s chest.

But then suddenly, they were walking through a park with several stone benches, all crowded with people. Yuuri spotted Phichit, as well as Guang-Hong and Leo, all gathered together at the end of a bench with picket signs.

“The people! United! Will never be defeated!” everyone was shouting, and Yuuri could see Viktor — now dressed again, perhaps? He couldn’t tell — looking around at the people in confusion, and as the crowd began to grow and mobilise, he felt Viktor’s fingers slipping from his.

“Viktor!” he shouted, but there was no response, only the chanting of the people. Yuuri pushed through the crowds, desperately searching for Viktor. He briefly noticed that Phichit, Guang-Hong, and Leo were still sitting at their bench, but he didn’t pay much attention to that, only rushing onwards through the maddening press of the crowd.

“Let’s give it up for Minako Okukawa!” someone shouted, and suddenly there was a hush as Minako, in a bright white lace dress, came walking past the bench where Yuuri’s friends sat. The three of them sprung to their feet as well.

Minako waved at the crowds. “I’m so glad to be your leader this year,” she said, to thunderous cheers and applause. “Let us hold hands and pray —”

“Mr Katsuki.”

Yuuri looked up. He was in a room with white walls. A white table. White chairs. All around him stood faceless androids, and he was cradling one of them in his arms.

“Mr Katsuki, the charges brought against you are very serious.”

Yuuri frowned. “What?” he asked.

“We examined the feed from this camera.” A man was speaking, but Yuuri didn’t recognised them. Where was Viktor? His friends? The protest? The hotel room? He looked around him, and found nothing that could give him a satisfactory answer.

A screen came down in front of Yuuri. A video feed was on it, projecting a gruesome crime scene. There were at least three bodies, but Yuuri suspected that there were more on the feed that these people were not showing him.

“Those people were killed in your living room, Mr Katsuki,” said the man. “Do you have any information on where you were at the time of March 31st at nine in the evening?”

Yuuri frowned. The android in his arms beeped into life. Yuuri watched its face take on Viktor’s, watched its body slowly take on Viktor’s body.

“What’s going on?” he asked, looking down at Viktor now lying in his arms, a little stiffly but still there.

“Answer the question, Mr Katuski,” said the man.

“I have an alibi for the night of March 31st,” replies Yuuri, gesturing to the man in his arms, “because I was spending the night with Viktor Nikiforov.”

And then they were back in the hotel room again, but this time Yuuri was the one on the bed, and Viktor was above him, cupping his face gently.

“The free skate is tomorrow,” said Viktor quietly. “I have to be up for that. Don’t tire me out.”

“I won’t,” Yuuri breathed, watching the silver hair fall in the man’s face and feeling his heartbeat pick up until it thundered in his ears.

“Good,” said Viktor, his breath just inches from Yuuri’s cheeks as he let the robe fall from his shoulders. The dim light of the hotel room shone against his breathtaking body.

Yuuri would have felt inadequate if it weren’t for the hungry expression in the other man’s eyes. Viktor’s steely blue gaze looked like it could devour him whole, and he would’ve let him without complaint.

“Before I got to Worlds, let’s have sex,” murmured Viktor, and almost instinctually Yuuri spread his legs in agreement, reaching out to bring him in for a kiss —

And he woke up.

The room was bathed in pale morning light, but it was unfamiliar. His suitcase was piled at the end, and the twinkle of a series of costumes were hung up in the closet. Yuuri sat up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, and paused at the feeling of a gold ring on his fingers.

The door to the ensuite opened, and Viktor Nikiforov walked out in his bathrobe, towelling at his hair. He paused when he saw Yuuri, his expression crinkling into a small frown. “Yuuri, is something wrong?”

Yuuri shook his head. “No,” he said. “I just had the weirdest dream about you.”

* * *

That night, Yuuri Katsuki won gold in the World Championships with a record breaking free skate that topped even the one he had garnered in the Grand Prix Final. Viktor, on the other hand, had barely missed the podium due to a fall in his free skate.

And as Yuuri smiled at Viktor from his place on the podium, he thought about possibly recreating some portions of the dream later tonight, after the celebrations. 

**Author's Note:**

> Happy April Fools! This is going down in 24 hours, probably. 
> 
> This is actually based off a dream I had last night, except instead of Yuuri and Viktor it was me and Yuzuru Hanyu. It... was really weird. I don't know what to say. And I was surprised to wake up to find he'd done so well in the FS! Go Yuzu! 
> 
> So yeah, happy April Fools, and talk to me on Tumblr [here](http://omgkatsudonplease.tumblr.com)!


End file.
